Do you ever look back and notice what your "life defining experiences" were?!? One of the great joys of being a Baby Boomer is being able to do this.
As a young girl who loved to sail, I was trained to race sailboats in a junior sailing program starting at age 12. My first introduction to sailing was at age 9, when my mother took me out for a sail in a Blue Jay. I still remember how exciting it was to feel the boat leaving the confines of the mooring and glide silently along the water, powered only by the wind. It felt so carefree and adventurous, not something I was used to feeling at home or in school as the eldest of 5 children at that time, which grew to 7 by the time I was 13. At 18, my youngest brother was born. I hadn't been sure I would like sailing, as I really loved horses but was not allowed to pursue my desire to become a horseback rider like a couple of my great aunts who were nationally ranked riders, one of them trained an Olympic equestrian. My mother was afraid of horses but she used to talk about sailing all the time. But after that initial sail, I couldn't wait to take sailing lessons the next summer!
The effects of those 5 years of sailing lessons, including 3 years of racing every single day of the summer, last to this day. This childhood experience was to impact my life on many levels, which of course, I never thought about at the time. I was just having fun out in the fresh air on the water with my friends and instructors, getting tan and learning to harness the wind to do my bidding and trying to get around the race course faster than any of the other boats because it was fun and exhilarating and it made my coach very happy when we won and I had a huge crush on him, as did the few other girls in my sailing class. It is only through looking back at life and experiences that one can see what a great difference someone or something made in your life.
When one is learning a new skill so much depends upon a number of factors like how good your coach is technically, how much enthusiasm he or she has for the sport, your "chemistry" with that coach, and of course, how much or how little you enjoy it. Very important too is your motivation for doing the work required to excel. I was very fortunate to be in that junior sailing program at a time when we had a top notch coach/head instructor who loved to race, loved to win and was a very nice, very handsome guy with a great smile. There weren't too many girls in the sailing school back then, but the ones that were - we all had huge crushes on him!
Besides wanting to see my coach happy, as he always was when I won, and the fun of spending time with my friends away from the restrictive eyes of our parents, the main motivating factor for me was the sheer joy of sailing as fast as I could get the boat to go. It was such a heady, thrilling feeling of freedom, almost like flying, being "free as a bird". I loved being out in the sunshine, on the water, feeling the wind and being one with nature. It was like riding a horse only I was "riding a boat"...on the water. I really enjoyed learning how to push myself as hard I could and use all that I had been taught and then getting to relax and celebrate afterwards. It was a great way to grow up and have fun with friends of all ages who also enjoyed sailing!
A big thing I learned as a young racer which has helped me with for my entire life is setting and achieving goals. As a racer, you are taught to break down the components of the race into winning the start, then winning the first, second and third marks and finally, winning the finish. Our coach taught us how to break down the important elements of each section and strategies for success with each one. First there was the start. Making a good start in the race, he taught us and proved to us was key to winning the race. Still possible to win if you didn't, but you had to work very hard, make all the right decisions, be lucky and count on others making mistakes in order to win if you didn't know how to be the first or at least in the top three over the starting line.
This is not much different than making a good impression at a new job, in a class, at a meeting, on a sales call, in a social situation or at a job interview.
Your next goal is to get to the first mark in first or second place. Our brilliant coach taught us that it is actually easier to succeed if you get there in 2nd place by finding out ahead of time who the best sailors are, picking the one you think will get there first and copying their tactics without letting them block you. Once you both get to the mark, make the best mark rounding you possibly can and then work the rest of the race on trying to pass them. It is important while doing this, not to focus on the other boat and get all stressed about who is doing "better" but just to focus on your boat and what you know how to do considering all the elements of wind, water, boat handling & teamwork, without breaking any rules, in order to get there first. It is all about maximum efficiency working with a number of variables, you could call it "being in the flow". Sailors call it "being in the groove".
Since each day is different in sailing and each person, team and boat has different strengths and weaknesses, you learn after a number of races which conditions are easier for you than others and how to plan to do well that particular day. This really helps with your self confidence under conditions that tend to be easier for you and makes you know you need to work harder and smarter under conditions that are more challenging, but not to get discouraged or overwhelmed. You just continue to focus on doing everything you possibly can to win. As they say " if you focus on reaching the moon, even if you fail, you will still end up with the stars".
